HEAVY METAL RULES – SCIENTOLOGY SUCKS

According to a recent news release from The Guardian, worshipers of the almighty heavy metal now outnumber followers of Scientology, and Satan, within England and Wales, based on a recent census conducted in the UK.

 

Detailed in the article, citizens of the UK that listed heavy metal as their religion number just over 6,000, while only about 1,900 listed their religious affiliation to the Church of Satan.  During the 2001 census, there was a push within the UK to list Jedi as a religion, gaining a total of roughly 390,000 devoted followers.  That Jedi number has since dropped more than 50%, with only about 176,000 claiming to be of the Star Wars ilk this time around.

 

The push to list heavy metal as a religious preference came about 3 years ago, with Saxon mainman Biff Byford volunteering for the position of world metal peace ambassador, saying to Independent.co.uk that “heavy metal is a tribal music and everyone is a member of the tribe. The audience is very, very loyal… especially the Germans. It’s not like pop music, where if the next song isn’t good enough then forget about it; with our music, people will allow you to be shit sometimes, and that’s one of the great things.”  Byford further added “when you do click with a big audience, it can be quite an experience, a massive connection… I suppose you could say it is a religious experience in a way.”

 

In an upset to Tom Cruise and John Travolta, only 2,418 UK citizens listed Scientology as their religion.  While L. Ron Hubbard is spinning in his grave, Cruise and Travolta are finding comfort with other men.

Well hello there!

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